There have been countless movies and TV shows glamorizing the thrill of sleeping with someone who works for you but few will make the plot line about a married couple. They have no idea how much more action, drama and thriller this involves! Yes, I confess I’m sleeping with my employee and she happens to be my wife. Usually this is a recipe for disaster for both work and family life and is not recommended. For those of you brave enough to bring your wife on board I have a few tips that will keep your sanity and your marriage. Here are my three life (and marriage) saving tips.
The first and hardest tip to follow is to never, ever get angry/annoyed at her publicly. I have messed this up countless times and have paid for it 10x over each time I did it. What usually happens is I’m trying to verbalize an idea or make a point and since she is such an awesome, smart, intuitive wife she will “innocently interrupt” me and reply to what I was saying before I finish. Then I, in all my masculinity, get frustrated at this public display of being cut off and I say something shallow, dumb and a bit harsh at times. It all seems innocent but it does a couple things that you can’t reverse in the office- first it makes you look weak for having to resort to putting her down; second, it makes you look like you don’t love your wife because you embarrassed her in public, and third, it makes your wife want to put an ice pick through your thick skull and walk away satisfied. The benefits of doing this are, well, ummmm, none.
My second tip is to always trust your wife’s intuition. Over the years Tina has warned me countless times about people or ideas she thinks are wrong and at times I have listened, which has led to a lot of good decisions. But more often than not, I usually doubt her, make her explain herself, sit on it for a month or two while I mull it over and then act once disaster strikes. This may sound idiotic and that’s because it is; for some reason God forgot to give most men a sixth sense when it comes to people while he gives women an abundance of this and it drives us nuts. I generally try to find the best in people and will trust them until proven otherwise while Tina can get around a person for five minutes and be like “That one’s not going to work out”. To this day I still have to fight down my irritation when this happens but when I have the sense to listen, I have never looked bad. Maybe I should read this article once a week so I remember? Anyway, take it from me; being macho and blowing off your wife’s advice is a mistake you will wish you didn’t make.
My third tip is simple, “Be nice to the girl”. I got this tip from my good friend Mark Gungor, who is one of the best marriage gurus I’ve ever seen. It sounds so simple but it’s so hard for us guys to remember. Even if you work with your mate don’t treat them like an employee. In the workplace, they need to be loved and appreciated more than ever, and there are lots of ways to show it. I highly recommend public praise with some flowers or something thoughtful sprinkled in a least once a month. This should get you more love points and forgiveness when you blow tips one and two.
Alright, now that we have gotten through some basic rules of working with your spouse, who is ready to sign up? If this isn’t for you then great, you are in luck! But if you do decide to take the plunge and you can stick by these principles it will be one of the most rewarding experiences you ever have.
By: Todd Marinshaw (In response to my wife’s seemingly popular post Married To My Boss). Todd and Tina own a sportswear business based in Orlando, FL and recently founded iPrevail, a non profit organization focused on relief and rehabilitation for victims of disasters such as Typhoon Haiyan.
Words of the wise!
Very good advice for those of us who have the privilege and joy of working with our wives! Point 1 & 2 are sooo true! Thank you!